Soul EP

by Portrey Youth

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Some of the mellow tracks that I had set aside, sort of like getting some things off of my chest.



released February 14, 2012



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Portrey Youth Boston, Massachusetts

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Track Name: LessonLivedLessonBurned
Losing sleep at night, these thoughts I wish I could tame.
I tend to wonder how all these demons know me by name.
haunting me everyday, I am my worst enemy driving myself insane.
thoughts of suicide left right after they came.

Everyone tells me my shit is so abstract,
how else can I explain where the fuck my head is at.
A product of my enviroment where I ignore everything Im told,
and blind to everything I see, my shoulders cold.

And people making music with hooks so they can make it centerfold
and here I am just trying to laydown my soul.

progression is lessons lived and lessons learned,
wondering when the world is going to let me have my turn.
you see Time is an impatient sinning plan, it waits for no one,
waits for no man. Time and tides work you can see casted in my eyes.
I dont regret living, I just regret living a lie.

My life is measured in lies, and "good trys"
I'm sick of fucking maybe "next times."
so I stick it to these rhymes while the world tightens my noose.
Thinking music is all I have left to spill my soul into.
and fuck the world if they're not feelin the truth, I made this for me not you.

Thoughts of living prosperous,
but my sanity seems to be what the cost is.
no motivation to walk the path thats narrow and straight
trying to make my own path fuck destiny I'll decide my own fate.
Track Name: Imelda (Mother)
I dedicate this to my mother, who is no longer here.
Imelda Esguerra. Mahalkita, you'll always be near.

ma, I just want to dedicate this track to you
and let you know your the reason I do everything I do.
not a day goes by that I don't miss you.
You taught me how to take my first steps
and see the world at its best,
even when I'm faced with the harsh truths.
I'm always so optmistic ,
cause of you , its cause of you.

I remember when I used to be down and out
upset at knowing what everything is supposed to mean,
you told me everything has a reason and to chase my dreams.
as a young man Im finally thankful for all the times you changed the way I viewed it.
the very reason I apply my soul to this music.

X Mom, thanks for laying down my path
My present and my past you're the reason I have all the morals that I have.

And when you were first diagnosed with the illness,
only worried about me and how I'd handle all of this,
You're still the most selfless person I know,
I try and carry this trait in me everywhere I go.
Caring for others and being a selfless soul.

And my best, in Filipino, in tagalog for you.

At kapag unang mo ay masuri ang sakit,
lamang nag-aalala tungkol sa akin at kung paano gusto ko pangasiwaan ang lahat ng ito,
Ikaw pa rin ang pinaka-walang pag-iimbot na tao na alam ko,
Subukan ko at dalhin ang katangian na ito sa sa akin kahit saan ako magpunta.
Aalaga para sa iba at sa pagiging isang walang pag-iimbot na kaluluwa.


And when you passed
there wasnt a single day that went by that I wasnt torn
Every moment I woke up I mourned,
Then I heard your voice in my head,
telling me the last thing you want is for me to be upset.
move forward with life as you can still see me,
and to be everything I aspire to be.

Dear mom, I am now 21, and I hope you couldnt be more proud of your son.
You're the reason Ive put so much passion into everything I've done.

Mother, my very motivation I still haven't forgotten not a single conversation
no not one, I still look to you for answers when I'm on the run
Let me do everything right by you I'm still your son, I'm still your son.
screaming at myself, am I living right, by you, I'm still your son.
I swear I'll do right by you, I'm still your son.

X Mom, thanks for laying down my path
My present and my past you're the reason I have all the morals that I have.